Last updated: September 2026
by Jess Knauf, Co-Founder, Family Law Service. Reviewed by Belinda Atkins, Managing Director, Family Legal Ltd. Information is current as of 2 September 2026.
Quick Summary
- Start by checking three things: that the solicitor specialises in family law, that they are regulated, and that they are open about how they charge
- The Law Society, the Solicitors Regulation Authority, Resolution, Chambers UK and the Legal 500 are the four places worth searching before you rely on adverts or Google rankings
- Ask who will actually do the day to day work on your file, because it is often not the person you meet
- Hourly billing is only one option. Fixed fees and unbundled help cover a lot of what most separating couples need
- Family Law Service works with ranked, Resolution accredited family solicitors and offers their advice at a fixed price, so you can get a proper legal opinion without opening an open ended account
How to choose family solicitor
To choose a family solicitor, check that they specialise in family law rather than general practice, that they are on the Solicitors Regulation Authority register, and that they will confirm their fees in writing before you instruct them. Membership of Resolution is a strong signal that they work constructively rather than aggressively. Meet or speak to two or three before you commit, and always ask who will handle the day to day work on your case.
Working out how to choose a family solicitor, and how to find a family lawyer in the UK you actually trust, is one of the first hurdles people hit after a separation. You are usually doing it at the worst possible moment: upset, short of time, and with no way of telling a genuinely excellent family lawyer from a well marketed one.
Get it wrong and it is expensive in two ways. A solicitor who takes an adversarial approach can turn a solvable disagreement into an 18 month court case. A solicitor who is not a family specialist can miss things that matter, like a pension that is worth more than the house. Before you commit to an hourly rate, it is worth seeing how the costs compare across the different levels of help.
This guide sets out where to look, what to check, what to ask in the first meeting, and the warning signs that should make you keep looking. At the end we explain the option a lot of people do not know exists: getting advice from a specialist family solicitor without handing over your whole case.
First, Do You Actually Need a Family Solicitor?
This is the question almost nobody asks first, and it saves the most money. The divorce itself is administrative. Most people handle the divorce paperwork themselves online without a solicitor at all. What genuinely needs legal input is the money and, if you cannot agree, the arrangements for the children.
It makes sense to instruct a family solicitor in full if any of the following apply:
- There has been abuse: including coercive, controlling or economic abuse. Do not try to negotiate directly
- Assets are complex: a business, several properties, trusts, an international element or significant pensions
- You suspect disclosure is incomplete: money or assets you cannot account for
- Your ex has already instructed a solicitor: and is pushing you towards a deal you do not understand
- There is a real dispute about the children: relocation, safeguarding concerns or a refusal of contact
If none of those apply and you and your ex broadly agree, you may need a specialist for a few hours rather than a few months. That distinction is the difference between a bill in the hundreds and a bill in the tens of thousands.
Where to Find a Family Lawyer in the UK
Ranking first on Google tells you a firm has a marketing budget. It tells you nothing about the quality of the advice. These are the sources that actually filter for competence.
1. The Law Society and the SRA register
The Law Society’s Find a Solicitor directory lets you search by postcode and by area of law, and it shows accreditations such as the Family Law and Advanced Family Law schemes. The Solicitors Regulation Authority register is the place to confirm that a person or a firm is regulated, and to see any disciplinary findings. Both are free, and both take about two minutes.
2. Resolution
Members of Resolution sign up to a code of practice committing them to resolve disputes constructively rather than by fighting. It is not a guarantee of quality, but it is a reliable signal of approach, and approach is what drives your final bill more than anything else.
3. Chambers UK and the Legal 500
These are independent legal directories that rank firms and individual lawyers based on research and client interviews. Firms cannot buy a ranking. If a family solicitor is ranked in either, other lawyers and former clients have said good things about them on the record.
4. Personal recommendation, with a caveat
A friend who had a good experience is useful. Just remember that their case was not your case. A solicitor who was superb in a high conflict children dispute may be the wrong fit for an amicable financial settlement, and will likely cost you more than you need to spend.
5. Independent review platforms
Read reviews for patterns, not for star ratings. Repeated complaints about unanswered emails, surprise invoices or being passed to a junior are far more revealing than one furious review from someone who lost their case.
How to Choose a Family Solicitor: Seven Checks Before You Instruct
Once you have a shortlist of two or three, run each of them through these checks.
- Do they do family law only? A firm that does conveyancing, wills, crime and family is not specialised. You want someone whose entire caseload looks like yours
- Do they have experience of your specific issue? Pension sharing, business valuations and relocation cases are all specialisms within family law. Ask directly how many cases like yours they have run in the last year
- Are they regulated and insured? Check the SRA register yourself. Do not take the website’s word for it
- What is their approach? Ask outright: would you write to my ex first, or suggest mediation first? The answer tells you a great deal about your likely costs
- Who will do the work? Partners sell, junior solicitors and paralegals often deliver. Ask for the name, the grade and the hourly rate of everyone who will touch your file
- How do they charge and communicate? Ask for a written client care letter with the rate, the billing frequency, what counts as chargeable, and how quickly they reply to emails
- Do you feel heard? This is not a soft point. You will be sharing the worst details of your life. If you feel rushed or patronised in a free consultation, it will not improve once you are paying
“The question we wish more people asked is ‘who will actually be doing the work on my file?’. We have seen clients who chose a firm because of an impressive partner, then spent a year dealing with a trainee and never spoke to that partner again. It is a completely fair question, and how a firm answers it tells you almost everything about how transparent they will be about the bill.”
Jess Knauf, Co-Founder, Family Law Service
Questions to Ask in the First Meeting
Many family solicitors offer a free or fixed fee first appointment. Go in with your property value, mortgage balance, pension statements and rough income figures, and with written questions. A vague question gets a vague answer, and vague answers cost money to correct later.
- Based on what I have told you, what range of outcomes is realistic?
- What would you estimate this costs in total, in a best case and a worst case?
- What could I do myself to reduce the bill?
- Do you think this case should go to mediation or arbitration before court?
- How often will I be billed, and will you warn me before the costs pass an agreed figure?
- Are you willing to work on a fixed fee for any part of this?
Want a Solicitor’s Opinion Without an Open Ended Bill?
Book an hour with one of our family law specialists at a fixed price. You get clear answers on your position, and you decide what to do next without being signed up to anything.
Warning Signs to Walk Away From
Some of these look like strength in the first meeting. They are not.
- Promising you a result: no honest family lawyer can guarantee what a judge will order
- Talking about “taking him to the cleaners”: aggression is billable. It is rarely in your interest
- Refusing to estimate costs: every case is different, but an experienced specialist can give you a range
- Dismissing mediation without asking about your situation: the family court expects you to have considered non court options, and can take a dim view of a party who refused to try
- A large upfront payment on account with no written scope: you should know exactly what that money buys
- Pressure to sign today: there is no deadline that justifies it
What a Family Solicitor Costs and How to Stay in Control
Most family solicitors charge by the hour, and the meter runs on every phone call, letter and email. Fully represented financial proceedings commonly run into five figures for each party. Our cost breakdown guide sets out how the numbers stack up at each stage.
Three things reduce that bill more than anything else. First, agree as much as you can before you instruct anyone. Second, do the administrative work yourself, such as gathering valuations and pension statements. Third, ask for fixed fees on any discrete piece of work, such as drafting or a single advice session.
On funding, keep two separate things apart. Legal aid for a solicitor in private family cases was withdrawn for most people in April 2013, and is now available mainly to victims of domestic abuse and in cases involving child safety, where you can provide evidence and you also pass the means test. Legal aid for family mediation is a different scheme and is means tested only, so you may qualify on income alone whether or not there has been abuse. You can check both on the GOV.UK legal aid checker.
Mediate UK
Not Sure You Need a Solicitor Yet?
If you and your ex can still talk, mediation is usually quicker and far less expensive than instructing solicitors on both sides. Our sister company Mediate UK can talk it through with you, and there is a government voucher of up to £500 available towards mediation where children’s arrangements are involved.
The Middle Option: A Specialist Solicitor, for Part of Your Case
Choosing a family solicitor is usually presented as all or nothing. Either you hand over your whole case, or you do everything alone. In practice there is a middle option, and it is what most separating couples actually need.
At Family Law Service we work with practising family law specialists and make their time available at a fixed price. The solicitors we work with include Rachel Adams, head of family law at DFA Law LLP, ranked for several years in Chambers UK and the Legal 500, and Emma Kirkland, a Resolution member and Law Society accredited family law specialist with almost two decades in family law. Solicitors providing legal advice through us are regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority.
That means you can buy exactly the piece you need. An hour of advice on whether the settlement you have been offered is fair. A full review of your case before you decide anything. Drafting of your clean break consent order for £499 once you have agreed the money. Court preparation if you are representing yourself. You know the price before you start, and there is no open account running in the background.
A typical example
A client came to us after two firms had quoted her for full representation on a financial settlement she and her ex had already broadly agreed. What she actually needed was a second opinion on whether the pension split was fair, and someone to draft the order properly. She bought an hour of legal advice, adjusted the split slightly on that advice, and had the consent order drafted. Her total spend was under £900 rather than the several thousand she had been quoted to start a file.
If you want a sense of where you stand before you speak to anyone, our AI Barrister Review produces a written report on the likely range of outcomes in your case. It is information rather than legal advice, but it is a useful benchmark to take into your first solicitor meeting.
Summary
Knowing how to choose a family solicitor comes down to filtering properly and then asking direct questions. Search the Law Society directory, the SRA register, Resolution and the independent legal directories rather than relying on adverts. Shortlist two or three, check they specialise in family law and in your particular issue, and ask who will do the day to day work and what it will cost in total.
Then be honest about how much solicitor you need. If your finances are complex, there is abuse, or your ex is not being straight with you, instruct someone properly. If you broadly agree, a few hours of specialist advice and fixed fee drafting will usually get you to the same protected position for a fraction of the cost.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I check a family solicitor is genuine?
Search their name and their firm on the Solicitors Regulation Authority register. It confirms they hold a practising certificate, shows the firm’s SRA number, and records any disciplinary findings. Only people on that register may call themselves solicitors and carry out reserved legal activities.
Should I use a local family solicitor or does it not matter?
For most cases it does not matter. Family law in England and Wales is the same everywhere, and appointments are routinely held by video. A local firm can be useful if your case is listed at a court they attend regularly and you want someone with a feel for that court, but do not narrow your search to your postcode at the expense of finding the right specialist.
Can my ex and I use the same family solicitor?
No. A solicitor cannot advise both of you, because your interests may conflict. If you want one neutral professional helping you both reach an agreement, that is mediation rather than legal advice, and you would then each be free to have the agreement checked by your own solicitor before it is made binding.
What if I have already instructed a solicitor and I am unhappy?
You can change solicitors at any point. Ask for your file and a final bill, and check the client care letter for anything payable on transfer. Raise a formal complaint with the firm first if the issue is service or billing, since every firm must have a complaints procedure and the Legal Ombudsman will normally expect you to have used it.
Is a cheaper family solicitor a false economy?
Not necessarily. Price mostly reflects location, firm size and overheads rather than ability. What matters is whether they specialise in family law, whether they have handled cases like yours, and whether the fee arrangement is clear. A fixed fee from a specialist is often better value than an hourly rate from a general practice firm.
Do I need a solicitor to get a consent order?
There is no legal requirement to use one, but the order has to be drafted in the correct form or the court will reject it. Most people who have already agreed their finances use a fixed fee drafting service rather than paying a solicitor’s hourly rate to produce the same document.
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